Acceptance in meeting oneself is important in the journey of self-realization. During these past years, I have had a quite intense journey of self-realization. There were moments that I had to accept the part of me that seemed strange yet familiar at the same time. It’s like standing in front of a dusty mirror and trying to clean it.

What you see in the mirror is you, and part of you is dusted in your memory. Parts that were pressed down inside, so I no longer want to recognize those parts. Parts that had been rejected, along with my lifeline.

Through this, I would like to share the reason I think it is crucial for us to have basic acceptance since the beginning of this journey. A journey to self-realization. A journey to visit your origins.

Mother With Child (1894), Léon-Jean-Basile Perrault, French, 1832-1908

Meeting the Great Mother Archetype

Accepting ourselves becomes a lot easier when we have met the Great Mother archetype. As I imagine it, acceptance itself is like sitting on her lap and feeling her embrace our whole selves. She welcomes us with warmth. We feel ourselves circled in a sphere of Love. Therefore, meeting Her helps us deal with our dusty and murky parts. Within Her embrace, we embedded our courage to keep walking into the dark side of ourselves.

But life never gives us any guarantee as to whether or not we have that chance. Or when this archetypal energy will meet us at the crossroads or perhaps at the beginning of the journey. Since the common pattern of what we may say as the beginning of this journey is meeting with our shadows, not with the Great Mother archetype, we will be awakened by the ‘shock’ of meeting our dusty and murky selves.

Meeting the Great Mother may help us reduce the shock, since for some there is difficulty accepting this part. Specifically, when one is in a self-rejecting pattern because of the absence of the Great Mother archetype in one’s life, this becomes the basic reason one needs therapy to meet this archetypal energy.

In Meeting Yourself

The shock that may arise when we meet our murky and dusty parts plays an important role in our lives. It is what is called awakening. Yet, many people shrink this energy into a mechanism of so-called self-growth. But from my perspective, there is no growth without fully realizing our original ‘seed’.

Realizing our seed is never easy since we already ‘grow’ by having an idealization of what kind of tree we are. We have this ideal self that becomes our framework of self. Our self-concept then relies on this ideal self. And to shatter this ideal self is what our murky and dusty selves did by showing up.

Our response to them depends on our willingness to accept them. Accepting them means letting ourselves have disillusionment. Also to claim our accountability for our wholeness. By accepting them, we also accept the responsibility to integrate them into our so-called ego-personality. Yet accepting them is not an easy task. And a progressive one.

Having an understanding that this is also a progressive journey will reduce the effect of shock. Meeting ourselves is a spiral journey. It means seeing ourselves in a more holistic way. Therefore, we often encounter unexpected facts about ourselves. So, by thinking of this as progress, not an end goal, we can meet them with a slight curiosity to keep exploring our unknown parts.

On Acceptance of the Gold, Not Only the Mud

on acceptance and meeting ourselves — James Abbott McNeill Whistler, American, 1834-1903

It would not be fair to ourselves if we thought that what lies in the darkness is only our mud and not including the gold. What we reject is not only a bad part of us but also a good part of us. Every part that we deemed ‘useless’ or ‘worthless’. These parts need a lot more space in our consciousness since accepting our gold means being accountable for what it is.

Being accountable for our gold means accepting the gift and being ready to give back to the world whenever it is needed. To do so, one needs a healthy ego container and a better whole-set of self-knowledge. It is not such an easy task.

This rejected gold, to some point, made us feel unworthy of having it. So accepting it consciously means we have to deal with our source of pain, the wound of rejection. Dealing with both the wound and the responsibility may shake and terrorize us. Thus, many would choose the easy way out by putting it back in the darkness. But we can’t unknow what we already know.

The best way to deal with this case is to view it as it is. Our gift is also our source of wounds. Then we trace back to the beginning of this wound. When we understand its source and heal it, we may find it easier to slowly share our gifts with the world.